"For last year's words belong to last year's language, and next year's words await another voice." T.S. Eliot
Here I am, at the almost beginning of a new year, a new decade.
I was fifteen years old when the calendar rolled from 1999 to 2000. When we all freaked out over Y2K. Despite common fodder of the time, the world didn't come to an end, and life moved on.
And in several ways, so did I.
But I've come to learn that, to my detriment, some parts of me are the same that they were back in 2000. In some ways, I'm still that same fifteen year old girl, depserately seeking the approval of others, to the point that I made (and continue to make) some less than stellar choices that had some less than stellar consequences.
Thus, the blog that you're reading now.
I hereby proclaim the year 2010 "The Year of Ginny." But what the hell does that mean?
I will dedicate the coming year to learning to love me, myself, as I am. In my preliminary research to try to figure out why I make the choices I do, particularly the ones that leave me hurt and confused, I've discovered at the very core of the "why" I do some things and make certain choices is a lack of real love for myself.
I know, it sounds like a big self-esteem building, give yourself a hug, after school special kind of exercise, but that's not what I intend this journey to be. At all.
I want the year 2010 to be the year in which I fall in love with myself. I'm not really sure how I'm going to go about this. But I know that I've got to try. I'm going to try to find my voice.
So, here goes.
